patapon

its time to blog . well I haven't been blogging for ages . look at how few my posts are last october and september compared to last august . :[ sorii . oh yeah . maybe because of the birthday stuff . I feel more and more pathetic . well basically I made a good habit and not follow it *idiot* I want to burry myself again . how many people are reading my blog anyways ? please comment on this post if you read my posts . couz at times I really feel like an idiot feeler . I dont know if people are even reading my posts . another faux pas . btw . my fave word in the world is faux pas :] its a French word meaning 'false step' or 'social blunder' well it means the disregard or wrong manners/etiquette :] I dont know why but I feel like I want to learn french :] its a very lovely language *i guess* well . moving on . PSP iS BROKEN TT.TT . no more patapon TT.TT well share . I feel like Bon doesn't deserve a psp go . well basically he doesn't even study . it might not look like it I'm smart . but laziness takes over . i can prove it ! make me talk about algebra . nature . genetics . human psychology . codes . rubiks cube . sudoku . and even spongebob I can give you a very favorable conversation and answers while if he reaches my level [third year] or even fourth year ! he can't answer you properly . this is only basing from his mind status at grade 5 . well basically he doesn't even know what 8x7's product is ! I really dont trust him . I picture his future as a assistant . or maybe a vulcanizing boy . well I'm basing from a third year's perspective with good human psychologic analization xDD well . basically if you talk to him all he talks about is facebook cheats . bike . and going out with MY uncle ! well whatever . i dont want to go and change him . he is very hard headded . and I guess I dont want to spent time with Tito anymore . well basically I dont want to change his mind also . why does he even think like that ? saying . I dont eat regularly and is therefore "evil" *joke* "disobedient" to my dear tita . gawdd ! I cried for that real hard . well . basically I was hoping real hard . that he ! of all the people in the world would understand me . he of all the people here . prior to the fact he is not with his only child and longing for him dearly . didnt he ever think a moment or so to fully understand my situation . of how I am so not used to living with other people . as respect I dont count them as strangers . I give full respect and all . but I am so not liking the way they they always talk about me like im nothing but a slut ..... wow a bad word on my post . but basically I feel like that . they judge me as if we dont live together and they say stuff as if I am 'evil' wow . they are like claming in a traditional view from tle our topic in conflicts in business management . what more can I do ? he doesn't even know he is my godfather and even disregarded it . I'm just a stupid person who needs to be fed and whom of which is hard headded and wouldnt do so . gawdd I feel like crying again . I feel miserable again . I hate this . well now I just can say possibilility I'll have another exclamation point . I feel more stupid . well nothing new . I already am . already was stupid .

-- stop the tears from falling . need to find self actualization . stop faux pas