4.06.2011

2 years ago .

April 6 2OO9
6:11Pm
I still remember everything clearly . I was holding my phone . waiting for my turn on the pc . waiting for my sister to tell me its my turn . I had a conversation with him . I was so glad it was him I was talking with . Until I realized he asked me the question . He gave butterflies to my tummy . the eternal happiness I thought would forever soar within me . Without question of how many times he would ask me . I just said yes . not wanting to care . but to be his .


That scenario was 2 years ago . the scenario I hold on to up to now . the scenario I would never forget . how his words always make me catch my breath . The scenario that I would want to come back to me . as tears flood me now as I type these words . I write this . I still love him . like what I promised . I dont use my tumblr too much to not bring too much pain because almost everything I read there actually causes me more pain than hapiness . I dont know myself . I remember . I used to do everything with you . I tell you even the smallest things that hurt in this condemned body of mine . and you would be my hero and heal it . I see myself as more stupid as I go . I tell you what goes through my head . You even know when I have dreams or not . But I remember more his dreams than mine . The dreams that used to haunt him and make him wake up in the middle of the night . It causes me pain till now . I want to be with him now more than ever . but who the hell i am to wish for that ?

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